“You’re right. Our children would all be better off if they didn’t have to deal with the problems of their parents.”
I’ve had a revealation. It’s time for a rebirth. Like for real. For those of us who are not only feeling the quickening of the collective reality, but who are willing and ready (mostly) to be an active particiapant in the birth of the new reality… well, this is our moment.
If you don’t already know, I have three children. A soon to be 10 year old, a 5 year old, and a soon to be 3 year old. So having been a parent for 10 years that kinda sorta makes me an expert, right? Okay, maybe not… Okay, fine, DEFINITELY not, but it does mean I have some experience. And I have even more experience (say over 30 years of experience) being a human person who has always been relatively self-aware and extremely self-reflective.
Basically what all this means is that I am person with kids who is acutely aware of how having kids can (and will) change a person’s life. Not only that, but because I am me, I have had the privilege of being more and more aware of how having kids can bring up EVERY possible insecurity, fear, judgement, belief, emotion and behavior I have ever had or had the potential to have, both conscious and, most especially, unconscious. Kids wake you up. And if you don’t wake up easily, then they’ll make it nearly impossible for you to stay asleep.
What is my point? My point is that it’s about damn time we pay attention to the children. It’s about damn time we stop trying to make and mold children into more of the same shit we have been making and molding children into.
So far it’s gotten us here. And that’s OK. Really. It’s OK. It’s worked. Mostly. And where it hasn’t worked… well, no one’s asking for someone to blame. Well, maybe some are. But those of us who are ready to move on… we’re just asking for a pause. Maybe a quick one. Then, we want a radical change in trajectory. And we’re kinda asking for that yesterday.
The thing is that for those of us who are wanting this change, the change isn’t so radical. We’ve already made some moves. We’ve already colored outside the lines a bit (or a lot) and degree by degree we’ve charted a new path.
We wear our babies.
We nurse in public and do so way past the collectively decided age of societal comfort.
We stoop to our children’s level.
We discuss things with our children.
We allow our children to make their own decisions.
We decide to let our children be “educated” at their own pace.
We allow our children to do things that bring them joy.
We are often called “hippies,” or “progressives,” or “attached,” or “too soft,” or “extreme,” or “weird.”
We have made choices for our selves and our children that do not fit the mold.
We have made choices for our selves and our children that make people question our motives and sometimes our sanity.
We have made choices for our selves and our children that make people uncomfortable.
We have made choices for our selves and our children that many of the social institutions cannot accommodate.
We have made choices for our selves and our children that put us in a minority position and therefore can be lonely.
But we have followed our hearts.
We followed our hearts.
For me personally, having children made it impossible for me to continue to ignore my heart. It made it impossible for me to continue to live according to conventional “wisdom” because it no longer made sense. The truth is, it never made sense. When it did it was only because I wasn’t paying attention. I couldn’t hear my heart any longer so sense was not even possible. But then I had kids. And as the saying goes…. then my heart was on the outside, and I was no longer capable of not paying attention.
WE ALL HAVE CHILDREN.
I came to all of this because I have kids. Three of them. And three of anything is hard to ignore. I realize now that if I didn’t have kids I probably wouldn’t have come to this realization. At least not in this way. I have no doubt I would have come to this in some way, though. And the same goes for those of us without kids.
The truth is that our children, ALL children, are a reflection of us. They are a reflection of our desires, fears, beliefs, values, judgements, and perceptions. They are perfect little mirrors for us to become aware of who, what, and how we are being and doing in the world. AND they are great indicators of where we are going, luckily with extreme potential for flexibility.
For those of us without children of our own, any children in our lives serve as a reflection. Any child we come across, whether familiar or stranger, can act as an indicator of where we are, or where we want to be. More than likely, they are a reflection of our subconscious. This means that they can help us determine the state of our INNER child, the part of us that is innocent, pure, curious, intuitive, creative, and joyful. For many of us, that’s the part of us that was silenced and put in the closet long ago.
It’s time to open that closet door.
We can become more in touch with this part of OUR OWN BEING by becoming aware of how we feel when we are around children.
How do I feel when children are around me?
What kind of feelings come up?
What kind of judgements or beliefs arise?
What memories or thoughts do I have when I am around (or think of) children?
What desires or fears are tied to my experience of children and/or my own childhood?
Thoughts about our parents and our perceptions of them are likely to come up. We may feel joy and comfort. We may feel a yearning for home and safety. We may feel small and helpless. We may feel deep pain and sadness or even anger and rage. Whatever comes up for us is EXTREMELY important. And we are being asked to no longer ignore it, or push it aside. Being aware of what experiences are tied to children in our lives and our own childhood is essential for healing the past and then creating the foundation for lasting change.
For those of us who are willing and ready to step into the new reality, where Peace, Equality, Abundance, Joy, and Love are the energetic rulers, it is imperative that we NOW pay attention to the children. To the children within. To the children without. To the children all around. After all, to birth a New World will require a new perspective, a new energy, a new zest for life, a new dream, a new vision. And who best to help with all of this newness than our inner and outer children?